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Three minutes in …

Three minutes in … 

To my renewed morning ritual
Of early to rise
Of slow to wake
Of pen to page 

Ethan flutters his eyelids
Army crawls to my side 
From my lap, I lift my hands
Pen in one, notebook in the other

He drops his head to 
My belly, now his pillow
And burrows in
Perpendicular, we are a T

I hope for sleep
Up late (bright moon)
Up early (bright sun)
Never enough sleep

He yanks the covers
To his shoulder
Fumbles with them
To cover his legs

Breath slows, evens
Breath loud, deepens 
Miraculously, he dozes off
I freeze, suspended 

Notebook and pen 
balancing on my knees 
Thoughts already 

My renewed morning ritual 
Interrupted before I
Even have a chance to
Abandon it (again). 

With my left hand 
I grab my phone 
Awkwardly tap buttons
And type these words 

The swirl of thoughts
More than I can capture 
Left-handed, word limited
So, it’s just this moment

And then he shifts 
Folds himself, turns 
Away, head to pillow
Sighs, snores

Unpinned, unparalyzed 
Free to move
Free to write
Unmoored, unfocused 

No longer anchored
To this moment
Even this ending
Unspools, fades, floats away


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